Dr. Malegatto Alter's "12 Days of Mad Scientists Christmas" (with commentary)

From Steelhead's holiday storytelling event (with a few edits for smoothness - and possibly broken ascii art, sorry):

[20:49] TotalLunar Eclipse: Well I do not look like a bad kitty, or ETK but Malegatto Alter's human had a family emergency
[20:49] Doc Wrangler: YA LUNAR!
[20:49] VelesJaeger Munster: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[20:49] Elegia Underwood: Lunar Elf Lord!
[20:49] CeAire Decosta: Eeek!
[20:49] Doc Wrangler: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
[20:49] Tanarian Davies: Oh noooo.
[20:49] Annechen Lowey: Oh, no.
[20:49] Elegia Underwood bows low.
[20:49] VelesJaeger Munster: Zorry to hear dot. Hy hopez efferyting iz hokay for her.
[20:49] Elegia Underwood: NOOOOOoooo.
[20:49] Riven Homewood: yes, I do too
[20:50] CeAire Decosta: Ditto to what Veles said.
[20:50] TotalLunar Eclipse: She herself is fine, but out of town
[20:50] Forelle Broek: tritto
[20:50] Elegia Underwood: And I was so looking forward to finally meeting the famous scientist. I hope all is ultimately well with her.
[20:50] Doc Wrangler: Send her our warm wishes, Lunar.
[20:50] CeAire Decosta: And to her family.
[20:50] TotalLunar Eclipse: I will *smiles*
[20:50] VelesJaeger Munster: Goot, tenk hyu.
...
[20:52] TotalLunar Eclipse: I was using voice earlier but there is no way I am going to sing 12 Days of Christmas
[20:52] Nabila Nadir: foo
[20:52] CeAire Decosta: Awww - Darn!
[20:52] Tibouchina Freschi: double foo
[20:52] Doc Wrangler: SING IT! SING IT!
...
[20:52] TotalLunar Eclipse: :P no
[20:52] CeAire Decosta: Just start with 12 and go down!
[20:52] Tanarian Davies: Pleeeeease?
[20:52] Doc Wrangler: FIIIIIVE...!
[20:52] Riven Homewood: We'll help you
[20:52] Annechen Lowey: Not even in Elvish?
[20:52] TotalLunar Eclipse: I will be reading after this, and using voice... but not singing
[20:52] Tibouchina Freschi: we will
[20:53] VelesJaeger Munster smiles encouragingly!
[20:53] TotalLunar Eclipse: and my name isn't Chauncy!
[20:53] Tanarian Davies: What Missus Decosta said... oh. Reading is OK.
[20:53] Nabila Nadir: lol
[20:53] Doc Wrangler: Ship ahoy!
[20:53] Riven Homewood: You'll never live that name down :-)
...
[20:54] TotalLunar Eclipse: What I am reading is, the 12 days of Mad Scientists Christmas by Malegatto Alter, our own evil tiny kitteh
[20:54] VelesJaeger Munster: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[20:54] KlausWulfenbach Outlander looks quite interested
[20:54] bowlofnoodle Tomorrow: Aah!
[20:54] Nabila Nadir: She's mad, MAD I tell you!
[20:54] Hotspur Otoole: Chauncey.
[20:54] VelesJaeger Munster: Uf courze.
[20:54] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me..... a tock lobster in a warehouse.
[20:54] Tanarian Davies: Tock?
[20:55] Greegar Hellershanks: lek clenk
[20:55] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Clockwork, perhaps.
[20:55] CeAire Decosta: (It goes with tick....)
[20:55] VelesJaeger Munster: Or t iz bezide r.
[20:55] TotalLunar Eclipse: (if no one has been to her warehouse there is a massive metal lobster)
[20:55] Greegar Hellershanks: tock lob-stah!
[20:55] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Ah, haven't seen it yet.
[20:55] VelesJaeger Munster: Heh. Zoundz like fon.
[20:56] Tanarian Davies giggles at Greegar
[20:56] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me... two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in a warehouse!
[20:56] Hawc Decosta: Armored Lobster, my favorite dish!
[20:56] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Tesla coils, very useful.
[20:56] Riven Homewood: can you use them to cook the lobster?
[20:56] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[20:57] Greegar Hellershanks: de cogs is to bost up de shell zo hyu ken eat it?
[20:57] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[20:57] Tanarian Davies: Is that four pair, or two pair?
[20:57] Elegia Underwood giggles... & giggles are not common to her kind.
[20:57] Annechen Lowey: at least it was an even number.
[20:57] Tensai Hilra: 4 pair *smiles*
[20:57] Doc Wrangler: Four LEFT gloves.
[20:57] CeAire Decosta: I would think potholders might be more useful at this point.
[20:57] TotalLunar Eclipse: Probably pair... have you seen the amount of crates full of rubber gloves at her place?
[20:57] Greegar Hellershanks: meybee de alle right hond glovez?
[20:57] Riven Homewood: Good to have rugger gloves around Tesla coils
[20:58] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[20:58] Doc Wrangler: So true Riven
[20:58] Elegia Underwood: Wow!
[20:58] Greegar Hellershanks: Hooh!
[20:58] Elegia Underwood: He must've loved her a LOT!
[20:58] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[20:58] Nabila Nadir: wow!
[20:58] CeAire Decosta: Flying high now!
[20:58] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Hmmm, needs a hangar now.
[20:58] Hawc Decosta: Or 5.
[20:58] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...six mobs a yelling
[20:58] CeAire Decosta: Careful, might get six of them.
[20:59] Nabila Nadir: uh oh
[20:59] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Ach, the mobs.
[20:59] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[20:59] CeAire Decosta: What are they yelling about?
[20:59] Greegar Hellershanks: hooh!
[20:59] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[20:59] Hawc Decosta: pitchforks and torches all a glow!
[20:59] Greegar Hellershanks: hy don lek dem
[20:59] Nabila Nadir: I think it has something to do with the giant lobster....
[20:59] Doc Wrangler: Love them airships...
[20:59] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Oh, mobs are always indignant about random monsters, or missing children... poisoned streams.
[20:59] Elegia Underwood laughs at Hawc.
[20:59] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[20:59] Elegia Underwood: This is a seasonal mob, Herr Baron!
[20:59] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[20:59] Greegar Hellershanks: huh-hoh
[21:00] CeAire Decosta: I think we have a riot on our hands.
[21:00] Annechen Lowey: Ah, the mob was useful after all. - volunteers.
[21:00] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[21:00] Tanarian Davies: Mad science does that.
[21:00] Tanarian Davies nods solemnly.
[21:00] Tensai Hilra: hehe
[21:00] Greegar Hellershanks: vy he not geef minions? deez zum kreppy troo loffer
[21:00] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...eight rats a running, seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[21:00] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[21:00] Tanarian Davies: Giant rats?
[21:00] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[21:00] CeAire Decosta: The rats were trying to get out of the way.
[21:00] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Not the rat-stretching machine at work....
[21:00] Hawc Decosta: Call out the Jaegers for Riot Control duty and vermin extermination!
[21:01] Greegar Hellershanks: ken ve eat de retz?
[21:01] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...nine minions missing, eight rats a running, seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[21:01] Nabila Nadir: missing?!
[21:01] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[21:01] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Missing! That won't do!
[21:01] Greegar Hellershanks: dey kidnep de minionz?
[21:01] Annechen Lowey: not properly trained.
[21:01] Searra Weatherwax: ROUS
[21:01] CeAire Decosta: How can you miss a minion?
[21:01] Elegia Underwood murmurs, in between fits of laughter, "I loooooove Steelhead."
[21:01] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[21:01] Tanarian Davies giggles
[21:01] Doc Wrangler: I love that airships part. That's my favorite.
[21:01] Tibouchina Freschi: BIG airships
[21:01] Hawc Decosta: Yes, none of us have enough of them, so hard to get good help!
[21:02] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...ten labs a burning, nine minions missing, eight rats a running, seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[21:02] Nabila Nadir: d'oh!
[21:02] Greegar Hellershanks: hommmm
[21:02] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[21:02] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: The experiment -- ruined.
[21:02] Annechen Lowey: niss your minions and the lab is in flames, and you lose your hat.
[21:02] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[21:02] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Very sad.
[21:02] CeAire Decosta: Maybe that was the experiment?
[21:02] Doc Wrangler: THE LAB! IT'S BURNING!
[21:02] Greegar Hellershanks: hyu ken ztart offer, Herr Baron
[21:02] VelesJaeger Munster: Lebz dun vork vhen dhey iz borning.
[21:02] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...eleven beakers bubbling, ten labs a burning, nine minions missing, eight rats a running, seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[21:02] Hawc Decosta: Tensai, have you been littering bombs near the warehouse?
[21:02] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[21:03] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!
[21:03] Annechen Lowey joins in, "Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!"
[21:03] Tensai Hilra whistles and looks innocent
[21:03] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Of course they're bubbling, the lab is burning and they're boiling over.
[21:03] Greegar Hellershanks: zee, de beakes in booblink . Iz lookink bedder all ready
[21:03] CeAire Decosta: Yeah, if the lab is burning that would be hot enough to melt a beaker.
[21:03] Greegar Hellershanks: ho.
[21:03] TotalLunar Eclipse: On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...twelve diff'rence engines, eleven beakers bubbling, ten labs a burning, nine minions missing, eight rats a running, seven folks a screaming, six mobs a yelling
[21:03] Remington Pinion: beakers are boiling I am sure from the heat of the fire
[21:03] Nabila Nadir: oooh!
[21:03] Greegar Hellershanks: hyu kent mealt de beaker ontil iz vinished bobblink
[21:03] TotalLunar Eclipse: FIVE BIG AIRSHIPS!
[21:03] VelesJaeger Munster does Beaker impression (from the Muppets)
[21:03] TotalLunar Eclipse: Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils..
[21:03] Annechen Lowey giggles, "Four rubber gloves, three brass cogs, two Tesla coils and a tock lobster in the warehouse!"
[21:03] Elegia Underwood: Here comes the finale!
[21:03] KlausWulfenbach Outlander: Ah, but if the difference engines are in the labs... there's not much of a point of them as a gift.
[21:03] Doc Wrangler: Diff'rence engines? What's the difference?
[21:03] Tensai Hilra: making up for it with the difference engines
[21:03] TotalLunar Eclipse: AND A TOCK LOBSTER IN THE WAREHOUSE!
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: ***** APPPPPPPLLLLAAAUUUSSSSEEEEEEE***********
[21:04] Nabila Nadir: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] CeAire Decosta: .-'`'-. APPLAUSE APPLAUSE .-'`'-.
[21:04] CeAire Decosta: Bravo!
[21:04] Searra Weatherwax: HOOOOOOOO!!!
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: And a tock Lobster in the Warehouse!
[21:04] Forelle Broek: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Tibouchina Freschi: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*.(¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´¨).¸..(¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´*•. ¸.•´ ** `•.¸.•´ `•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: `*•.,_,.•*(¸.•*´♥Steelhead Rocks!!♥`*•.¸)`*•.,_,.•*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´¨) (¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸`•.¸(¨`•.•´¨)..•´¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸`•.¸.•´¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] KlausWulfenbach Outlander applauds
[21:04] Hotspur Otoole: brava!
[21:04] CeAire Decosta: .-'`'-. APPLAUSE APPLAUSE .-'`'-.
[21:04] CeAire Decosta: Bravo!
[21:04] Greegar Hellershanks: Hoooo!
[21:04] Annechen Lowey giggles and scares the cat.
[21:04] CeAire Decosta: :*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:
[21:04] VelesJaeger Munster: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Remington Pinion: Hoooo!
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: .-'`'-. APPLAUSE APPLAUSE .-'`'-.
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: Bravo!
[21:04] Tanarian Davies: Hoooo!
[21:04] Annechen Lowey: `*.¸.*´ APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´
[21:04] Hotspur Otoole: I was deeply mmoved.
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: Hoooo!
[21:04] Riven Homewood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Annechen Lowey: `*.¸.*´ APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´APPLAUSE `*.¸.*´
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUAAAHHHHHHH!!
[21:04] Hawc Decosta: *beats chest*
[21:04] Hotspur Otoole: or was that something I ate?
[21:04] VelesJaeger Munster: HOOOOOOOO!!!
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: `*.¸.*´
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*.(¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´¨). I .(¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´*•. Love .•´ `•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: `*•.,_,.•*(¸.•*´♥ Steelhead! ♥`*•.¸)`*•.,_,.•*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸(¨`•.•´¨) (¨`•.•´¨)¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸`•.¸.•´¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. ¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: `*.¸.*´
[21:04] Elegia Underwood: Hey!
[21:04] Riven Homewood: HooHooHoo!! HooHooHooHooHoooooo!
[21:04] VelesJaeger Munster: *:-.,_,.-:*'´ `*. HoOoOoO!¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
...
[21:04] CeAire Decosta wipes a tear from her eye....(from laughing so hard!)
[21:04] bowlofnoodle Tomorrow: YEAH!
[21:04] Doc Wrangler: WOO-HOOO! AIRSHIPS!
[21:04] Remington Pinion: brought me to tears, but I am sure it was a reaction to the bubbling beakers